Make Out Mix

I have a weird job. One of the things that I get paid to do is to create a weekly playlist of sexytime make out songs that are automatically loaded into portable "devices." That way, people can just plug in their device, and start their Friday night listening to, um, sexytime make out songs. Kind of creepy, huh? My suspicion is that those in charge had a big laugh assigning this particular list to me -- and while at first my face got all red when I had send them to my editor (e-mail goes something like, hey bob, here's this week's big make out songs. Do they meet with your approval?" blush blush.

However, turns out it's loads of fun to put together (and much better than whoever is stuck with the weekly "work out mix" UGH!) I try to pick some corny "classics" that are funny to listen to in context (although at closer listen I discovered that Journey's cringeworthy "Lovin' Touchin' & Squeezin'" is actually a jealous and bitter loser song -- I'm pointing at YOU Steve Perry.) I pluck songs from lots of unexpected genres (George Jones & Tammy Wynette's "Take Me" is a great one.) I also try to throw in a few curveballs, like Mirah's "Murphy Bed" (which is a plea to her on-the-road sweetie to tie her to the bed and "let's do all the things we said") to see if anyone will mention it to me, like, hey -- maybe not so S&M on the next list, ok? Of course, no one says anything about the list to me -- ever. Except for once laughing at me about after a particular indie rock Belle & Sebastian tinged sexytime list. Too sweet, okay. Maybe that's how I ride.

I was very pleased with this week's sexytime list:

• "You Sexy Thing" - Hot Chocolate
  

At my parent's house I have a tattered gradeschool CCD workbook somewhere (CCD is Catholic class for public school kids spared from daily exposure to nuns.) There's a page that asks lots of questions like -- what's your favorite color, what's your favorite food, and then, what's your favorite song? My response in scrawley grade school writing? -- Hot Chocolate "You Sexy Thing" I had no idea. Come to think of it, no one ever said anything about it to me then! You cannot deny the greatness of this song, even when you are 11 and have no idea what it really means.

• "Your Touch" - The Black Keys

Scrawny white nerds from Ohio who sing gritty sexed-up blues songs, the perfect match.

• "Do You Wanna Touch Me" - Joan Jett

Another classic that we all sang along loudly with in high school without giving a thought to being assaulted. Plus, Joan Jett in black leather with an Elvis snarl. Need I say more?

• "Come Close" - Common

It's hard to find a sweet, sincere hip-hop love song that doesn't use bad words to describe the ladies. This is a sweet, sincere hip hop song that will make you want to track down Common and give him a kiss. (update, I just saw Common on the TV rapping "Peace, Love, The Gap" so I'm re-thinking him as someone I would want to kiss. Peace, Love, The Gap? blah!

• "Let's Stay In And Make Love" - Nick Lowe

An adult old married folks sexytime song, that is quite blunt! Getting the message across, because old people don't have time to waste.

• "Make The Night A Little Longer" - Dionne Warwick

This song rules because Dionne actually makes a plea to GOD to extend the length of the evening so she can have more sexytime fun. Does that make it a gospel song?

• "Want No Other" - Holly Golightly

An underappreciated UK vocalist who sings many alluring 60's vintage-style songs about romance that range from upfront (the Headcoatees "Come Into My Mouth" -- I was not daring enough to include that one this week -- eek) I picked this one because she tells her bloke that even though he's a big jerk, she still digs him anyway. Who can explain the magic of love?

• "We're Gonna Boogie" - Primal Scream

See Black Keys above, replace scrawny nerds from Ohio with scrawny nerds from Scotland singing gritty sexed-up blues songs. Boogie, you know what I mean? nudge nudge, wink wink. Note that this is from their first new CD in years, and it rocks.

• "The Way You Move - (featuring Sleepy Brown)" - Outkast

My least favorite of the list, I never quite got the whole Outkast frenzy, but I try to throw un-adventerous listeners a familar treat if they can make it this far down this list.

• "Kiss Me Neck" - Lee "Scratch" Perry

An instrumental, yet one of the sexiest songs of them all. This was one of the Upsetters' very first singles, from the 1960s. Mix the title w/ the rock steady chugachugachugs and the vocal exclamations at the close -- wow. Sometimes the sexiest songs have no lyrics.

So next time someone asks me, "so what do you really do again for work?" I'll tell them I make lists of sexytime makeout songs that can instantly downloaded as a "dynamic" playlist to their portable "device" so they can enjoy a sexytime weekend, and maybe I'll hand them this list.