Kelley Stoltz

and bubbles...

Rock Mama Salute

Happy Birthday Rock Mama (it goes without saying...but you ROCK!)

bleu

I missed the Chinese New Year's parade, so tonight I'm dreaming of lucky dragons and rats wearing rain ponchos.

the ultimate Redonk

Because the moment I realized that I was at the same party as Cojo (also known as "that weird fashion guy") I completely lost my marbles. They are rolling out of my ears in this photo. Thanks to Michelle (the cool cellist from Chicago) for capturing this ultimate redonk.

Office Garden

While I was out of the office, we moved into a new building across the street. There is a giant patch of green in the middle. I like it.

cough cough

All this redonk and coast-to-coast traveling has given Haus Frau a bad cold. cough cough cough.

Enough already -- I'll tell you more stories of the redonk next time I drink too much and start going on about chatting w/ Josh Groban and pushing past Chaka Khan. You can just shake your head and worry about the state of my reality.

Until then, it's time for a box of tissue and a long nap.

Happy Hearts Day

We interrupt the redonk with a little love from the Terrordactyls.

Happy Valentine's Day...!

Redonk #1 #2 #3

I survived my trip to L.A. -- and even though I may get drunk and curse at next year's show, I will never think of this tired horse of an industry event with the same disdain. I credit a bunch of talented musicians who won a contest, one amazing stage manager and a VIP backstage all access pass (!). It just got stranger and more hysterical each day I was there.

Redonk #1:

Did I tell you the story where I was trying to find the orchestra rehearsal and I asked some dudes to point me to Stage 11? They pointed across the street. When I told them I was with (insert the place) they said, "the place?! We're JOURNEY!" (note that Journey just found their new lead singer by looking at videos on, you got it, the place.) When I stopped by the next day, who was hanging out watching them rehearse? That's right -- (redonk #2) the Backstreet Boys! How could I not take a picture of A.J. hanging out with Journey. That guy on the right also stopped by to gush and Neil told me (ha!) he was an amazing guitarist. Anyone recognize him?

I also had the opportunity to meet Arnell. He is Journey's new lead singer who arrived from the Philippines. Naturally, he sounds exactly like Steve Perry. He also combs his hair obsessively with one of those big plastic combs that you probably had sticking out of the back pocket of your jeans in middle school. Were those the same years you listened to Journey? Arnell is historically accurate.

Redonk #3:

When I finally made it to the correct rehearsal stage, my group was long gone. I squinted at who was in there now, also with a full orchestra. It was Herbie Hancock and Lang Lang at dual pianos rehearsing "Rhapsody in Blue" so I pretended I was supposed to be there. Eventually, I asked a guy the whereabouts of the other orchestra, but he just shook his head and said, "Bocelli is showing up here later." At this point, the English language was starting to sound like "mwah mwah mwah mwah" so I ran to my car and locked the doors.

L.A. Redonkulous

Every year Hausfrau likes to get drunk, watch a certain awards show and yell expletives at the television as she watches the endless stream of shiny golden objects bestowed upon "the best of the year" piles of poo wearing lipstick. There can be exceptions to this rule, and when that occurs Hausfrau jumps up and down and says hooray --- completely shocked that a bit of brilliance has sneaked through to be included in rest of the mediocre heap. Hausfrau admits that she is a bit particular when it comes to music. She is thumbs down on stylists and thumbs up on the real deal. Her favorite awards show performance in recent memory ? Ralph Stanley in single spotlight at the end of a dark stage singing “Oh Death” (talk about yer goosebumps! ) But that was the same year that the “Oh Brother Where Art Thou” soundtrack swept the ceremony, culminating in a best album that was accepted by #4 on Hausfrau’s top ten giant crush list – T-Bone Burnett. That year Hausfrau was so overwhelmed that she lost her voice screaming “OH MY GOD!” and passed out. I think this also happened another year when Elliott Smith appeared with Celine Dion in the “soundtrack medley” portion of the program, the sight of which crashed Hausfrau’s entire system and she had to be defribulated.

So, you can imagine the total reluctance and forced enthusiasm when the odd shift in time and space seemed to be propelling her closer and closer to Los Angeles and a single ticket that was way way up in the not-so-important-people seats. At first when the subject came up she hid under chairs and made up excuses to go to the bathroom. Then she crafted a reasonable argument that she believed was airtight. She followed it up with a private meeting that involved lots of busy schedules and a HUGE disinterest in Carrie Underwood. The whole time, there was a tiny itch telling her that there was no way she was getting out of this. She could feel the terror of L.A. schmooze parties and limos right around the corner. Then one topsy turvey day (not unlike every single topsy turvy day!) it was presented to her as a requirement that if not completed would result in the total downfall of the entire project. Hausfrau said, “Ok, fine. I’ll go.”

And that is the story of why Hausfrau is now in L.A.

Stay tuned for more redonkulous stories that involve (eek -- gratuitous name dropping alert!) The Foo Fighters, Journey!, Jason Bateman, Jerry Lee Lewis (and his entourage) Juliette Lewis and the most redonk -- The Backstreet Boys. Holy crap.

Super Fat Tuesday

Haus Frau loves a parade (and a Second Line.)

But she loves gumbo and king cake even more.

Happy Mardi Gras -- Laissez les Bon Temps Rouler!

Scarlett Stumps

Earlier today Scarlett Johansson called to tell us to vote for Barack. And if someone claims that a video involving scarlett, will.i.am and kareem abdul jabbar is "grassroots" -- I say pleeeze. That's as good as throwing in some sweeping John Williams orchestrations behind a Steven Spielberg death scene in the department of emotional manipulation. I wish this election were over already and we could cheer on the first black atheist woman elected as President and shut that other guy up. Do we have to wait until November?

p.s. Scarlett ain't the boss of me. However, if Sally Timms called to ask me to vote for Mike Gravel, I would totally do it.

Update: Stevie Wonder called us on Tuesday. (still not Sally Timms)

Vampire Weekend

Favorite indie band of the week. Vampire Weekend. Despite their super goth name, they are a bunch of harmless kids from Brooklyn who mix up indie with Afro-pop. Dig that Cape Cod kwassa kwassa sound.


On Friday night Vampire Weekend played at Amoeba Records. I dragged the Chef there. He looked around at the rest of the crowd and asked me, "Are they going to play some sort of geek rock?" I must agree, the crowd was suspiciously nerd infested. I assured him that it would turn out okay and that he would enjoy the music.

After the very short set from Vampire Weekend, we walked to Lime Tree for dinner. The Chef said that it was only four blocks away. After the eighth block I asked, "Is it on the next block?" and the Chef replied, " I think it's just up there." and then "It's on the next block" and then, "If it's not on the next block it's on the one just after" and then "I'm sure it's right up there!" Hausfrau had several immediate bodily needs -- she had to go to the bathroom, was carrying a very heavy lap top and was in desperate need of a beer. She harumphed, "That next block thing was funny five blocks ago. "

However, when we got to Lime Tree -- Haus Frau cheered up. Even though they didn't serve beer (goddammit!) just funny coconut waters and soda pops. Lime Tree was a secret oasis of steaming hot roti pratha (that I wanted to eat all night) and delicious Singapore chicken noodles. Did I mention corn fritters? YUM! Lucky thing for the Chef, as I would have been super grumpy if it sucked. But no way -- dinner at Lime Tree was delicious, my new favorite odd basement Malaysian restaurant next to UCSF that is probably about ten blocks from Amoeba Records. I would stomp there again. I mean Haus Frau would -- maybe -- for more roti pratha please.

Kittens

You would think that a crazy cat lady would post more kitten pictures.

This is Clementine -- she likes bags.

..and Miss Sweet Pea -- she likes lots of attention, any kind will do.